Tears during Christmas movies you've never cried at before. Snapping over small things like tinsel placement. Getting emotional because the pavlova doesn't look quite right. If you're going through menopause, these moments of emotional intensity during the holidays aren't random, there are good biological reasons why everything feels bigger right now. 

Why Everything Feels So Much Bigger 

Fluctuating estrogen affects your brain's emotion-processing regions. Estrogen regulates neurotransmitters like serotonin and dopamine that stabilise mood. When estrogen swings or drops, these become dysregulated. 

Estradiol fluctuations create unpredictable emotional ups and downs (Deshpande & Rao, 2025). Add Christmas nostalgia, memories of people who've passed, family dynamics, pressure to feel "merry" and it's the perfect storm for emotional overwhelm. 

When Nostalgia Hits Hard 

Christmas is loaded with nostalgia. Every tradition can transport you back—beautiful and painful if you're missing someone. 

Bereaved people who engaged with nostalgic memories showed declines in distress, whilst avoiders saw symptoms worsen (Reid et al., 2021). Nostalgia strengthens social connections.

If nostalgia becomes overwhelming: 

• Don't fight bittersweet feelings. Nostalgia mixes happiness with sadness. 

• Create new rituals honouring old ones. Light a candle, play their song, share stories. 

• Talk about memories. Sharing helps people feel connected. 

• Skip painful traditions. You can love someone without recreating every ritual. 

Managing Tears and Mood Swings Around Family 

Family gatherings amplify emotional intensity. Here's how to prepare: 

Before the gathering: 

• Identify a support person. Tell someone trusted: "My emotions are intense. Can I signal if I need a break?" 

• Plan escape routes. Know where you can go for a private moment. 

• Set realistic expectations. You don't need to be perfect. 

During overwhelming moments: 

• Name what you're feeling. Thinking "I'm overwhelmed" can help reduce intensity. 

• Pause before responding. Take three slow breaths. 

• Leave the room if needed. "I need a moment" is enough. 

When tears come: 

• Let yourself cry if you can. Crying releases stress hormones. 

• Quick composure tricks: Press tongue to roof of mouth, tense leg muscles, or splash cold water on wrists. 

Grounding Techniques for Overwhelming Moments 

When emotions feel overwhelming, grounding brings you back to the present. Grounding regulates your autonomic nervous system (Koniver, 2024). 

5-4-3-2-1 technique: Name 5 things you see, 4 you touch, 3 you hear, 2 you smell, 1 you taste. 

Physical grounding: 

• Plant your feet. Press both feet flat and notice the sensation. 

• Hold ice. The cold shock interrupts emotional spirals. 

• Squeeze and release. Clench fists for 5 seconds, release. Repeat. 

Breathing: 

• Box breathing: Breathe in for a count of 4, hold for a count of 4, breathe out for a count of 4, hold for a count of 4. Repeat.

• Hand on heart. Feel your chest rise and fall whilst breathing slowly. 

Communicating Your Emotional Needs 

You don't need to struggle through the holidays in silence. Setting expectations can prevent misunderstandings. 

What to say: 

• "I'm going through menopause and emotions are more intense. I might need breaks during Christmas." 

• "I'm feeling nostalgic. It helps to talk about Mum/Dad rather than avoid mentioning them." 

• "If I seem teary, it's not about you, my hormones are making everything feel bigger." 

• "I need less pressure to be cheerful and more permission to feel whatever I'm feeling." 

When to Seek Extra Support 

While heightened emotions are common during menopause, certain signs indicate you should seek professional help: 

• Persistent sadness lasting more than two weeks 

• Loss of interest in activities you enjoy 

• Significant changes in sleep or appetite 

• Thoughts of self-harm 

• Difficulty functioning daily 

If you're experiencing these, talk to your GP. The menopausal transition increases depression risk, and early help makes a difference. 

Remember: Feeling Deeply Isn't a Problem 

The ability to feel deeply, to be moved by memories, cry at beauty, experience love and loss, isn't a flaw. 

Menopause might make you more emotionally vulnerable, but that lets you experience profound moments more fully. Those tears during carols? Evidence music moves you. The overwhelm? Proof you've loved deeply. 

Your emotions aren't "too much." 

How Emsee Can Help 

Want support on your menopause journey? Book a consultation with one of our experienced healthcare providers today. The first consultation with a doctor is gap-free and bulk-billed, which means no out of pocket cost to you. Choose a time that suits you via our booking portal here or call 1300 412 422 to speak to a member of our team.    

Alternatively, answer a few questions about your health and lifestyle to get a free assessment report on your situation and discover if Emsee is the perfect match for you.  

References 

Deshpande, N., & Rao, T.S.S. (2025). Psychological Changes at Menopause: Anxiety, Mood Swings, and Sexual Health in the Biopsychosocial Context. Journal of Psychosexual Health. 

Reid, C.A., Green, J.D., Short, S.D., Willis, K.D., Moloney, J.M., Collison, E.A., Wildschut, T., Sedikides, C., & Gramling, S. (2021). The past as a resource for the bereaved: nostalgia predicts declines in distress. Cognition and Emotion, 35(2), 256-268. 

Wildschut, T., Sedikides, C., Arndt, J., & Routledge, C. (2006). Nostalgia: Content, triggers, functions. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 91(5), 975-993. 

Koniver, L. (2024). Grounding To Treat Anxiety. Medical Research Archives, 12(12). 

This article is intended for informational purposes only and does not replace professional medical advice. Please consult with a healthcare provider for any specific symptoms or issues you might be experiencing.